I just spent 25 minutes weaving through sidestreets trying to get from 8th avenue to 2nd avenue. Conferences suck. There’s some big douchebag motivational speaker conference in town, featuring such popular douchebags as Peyton Manning, Tommy Franks, and Rudy Giuliani (which I learned by walking past him on the street as I went to get coffee this morning, which was a little surreal).

As a result, every douchebag in a 1000 mile radius has flocked to downtown Nashville, with the express purpose, as far as I can tell, of clogging up my normal 5-minute commute.